Hi there!

Tony and Michelle Peterson #staymarriedI’m Michelle. My husband Tony and I work together on this #staymarried project; I do most of the writing and he does the designing. We’re a team in all aspects of life and our greatest joy is to encourage other couples in the beautiful and daunting work of building a life together. We do that in 3 ways…

1. The Blog

Here you’ll find hundreds of articles we’ve written since 2012. The first post we ever published still sums up our heart and vision pretty well. Here are a few of the most popular.

♥ 51 Little Ways to Build Your Marriage
♥ Does Marriage Really Have to Be Hard Work?
The Best Apology – How to Say Sorry Like You Mean It

2. The Podcast

Since we like each other so dang much, we decided to let you listen in on some of our conversations. We run our podcast in seasons and you can find them by searching “#staymarried” on iTunes or your favorite podcast app. We also keep an archive here where we post additional resources for each episode.

In Season 1: The Seven Do’s and Four Don’ts for a Long and Happy Marriage, we took listeners through the principles found in the New York Times Bestseller by Dr. John Gottman called The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work.

In Season 2 we brought in Love Experts like Marriage and Family Therapists, our own Marriage Mentors, and even other marriage podcasters to answer questions submitted by our listeners. We covered everything from in-law struggles to why you need a tribe of people if you want your marriage to succeed.

Season 3 starts on March 15th. Here’s a snippet for you to listen to.
Listen to “Season 3 of The #staymarried Podcast is COMING SOON!” on Spreaker.

3. Email

Love Notes - #staymarried blog for couples with FREE printablesWe’d love the chance to encourage YOU! Our email subscribers are the first to hear about new blog posts and podcasts, special discounts and giveaways for great marriage resources, and even speaking events and casual meetups as we travel around the country. If you subscribe today, we’ll send you a little gift, these adorable Love Notes that you can print at home or save to your phone to crop and text whenever you want to send your love a little message.

Get Your Free #staymarried Love Notes

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What do other people think?

“#staymarried is one of the best resources out there for couples that want to stay married. Michelle’s talent as a writer and Tony’s skill as a designer have resulted in digital content that is relatable, informative, practical, and beautifully presented. They created #staymarried to be a place of support and encouragement for couples struggling – they have done that and more. We cannot say enough about the amazing work that Tony and Michelle are doing to help people in their marriages. We have enjoyed collaborating with #staymarried on various projects and look forward to further partnership in the future.”
– Michael Fulwiler, Director of Marketing at The Gottman Institute

 

“I’ve been reading your blog off & on for quite some time, but since my husband is more of a listen-to-a-podcast-rather-than-read-a-book kind of guy, the podcast is a big hit! We have been married for 33 1/2 years. There’s something to be said for just sticking things out, but there’s more to be said about still WANTING to be together…and that’s what we’re working on. We have a lot to learn, and unlearn, after all these years, and you’re helping us stay married. Thank you!”
– Jeanne B.

 

“Thank you so much for these podcasts you guys are doing! They are great! I am married. This is my second marriage and I am listening to this series because I want my second marriage to continue to be successful. My first marriage was an emotionally abusive relationship for me so I have had to throw out all of my old “baggage” for my current marriage, which has been hard. Anyways that’s why I love these blogs and podcasts. Because being in the safe and loving relationship I am in now is so precious to me. But we do have our “ups and downs”. I think in the “downs” it’s easy for me to get depressed and discouraged. And you both are so bubbly and loving. I love it!!! Keep doing what you are doing! I’m an avid listener and will continue to be a fan of your podcast and blog.”
– Tera

 

“Greetings from the Middle East! After I came home from deployment the last time my wife and I knew so little about Gottman and the four horsemen (divorce predicting behavior), actually we knew nothing. After some serious work and learning we are in such a great place even though I’m 11 time zones away. Please keep up the awesome work helping couples! It is so important. Take care.”
– Jeremy

 

“My marriage was on the brink of ruin until I fell upon your blog on Facebook. My husband and I have been through some dark waters and when I was about to give up, this blog encouraged me to fight for what was most important, my family. It is a decision that I do not regret at all.”
– Sheila

Our Little Love Story

Tony and Michelle Peterson #staymarriedTony and I met in a bar in Lake Forest Park, Washington on a Thursday night in the summer of 2001. He was in a band playing live and I was with some friends who had nothing better to do. I was instantly awestruck, he could probably tell. We made eyes at each other and he made it a point to remember my name and use it often over our next few encounters. We started dating a few years later – mostly breakfast dates – and then, on a humid August evening in 2006, he asked me if I would marry him in front of our church home group. We were married at Golden Gardens in Seattle on June 8, 2007. We make our home in the burbs just outside of Seattle, Washington. We adore the Pacific Northwest, but we would much rather go for a long walk in the city than hike a wooded trail. We love and admire each other deeply. We are silly and sarcastic. We love good food. We love to slow dance in our kitchen to Coldplay and old Michael Jackson songs. We love our three little daughters. We love LOVE.

#staymarried About Us - Peterson Family 2015

Why does #staymarried exist?

This blog is an attempt at solving my insomnia problem. In the short time that Tony and I have been married, we have witnessed innumerable couples separate and divorce, and this makes it hard for me to sleep. I get angry about divorce. I feel devastated with each story I hear. I began to feel hopeless about marriage altogether. Then, over the course of a few restless months, I began to tweet little things about marriage with the hashtag #staymarried simply to encourage the couples I knew. The response I got was overwhelming. People began to share their stories with me, arguments they were having with their husband or wife, desires to be happily married and realities that they might be on the brink of separation. It became clear that 140 characters might not be enough. I decided to spin all of this frustration I have about divorce into hope and resources for couples who want to stay married. I began to write, I began to sleep better. I realize the stats are bleak when it comes to couples staying together, but I have hope that we can do something about it. I have hope that I am not the only person out there who will fight for their marriage. I have hope that there are couples who are struggling, but are willing to learn some new ways of doing things and take on some new perspectives so that they don’t end up standing in front of a judge one day listing the details of their marriage and watching a gavel fall on its demise.

 

 If you’re new to the blog, welcome!

Check out my first post, it’ll explain more. Then, as you read, know that I am in your corner. My husband and I are on a journey to #staymarried and we hope you are, too!

S U B S C R I B E

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37 responses

    • Hi- Thrilled to see a wonderful blog like this. We too sought out to repair our marriage & then help others. We started with a Christian therapist and moved on to Celebrate Recovery at another church , then started one at ours. After five years of running the program we retired.
      Not defeated but with aging parents we were caring for (and lost one parent a month ago) for two of our parents. We took a sabbatical from our CR. We pray the new leaders who were not prepared to take over, wll rise to the occassion. My daughter Ashley Boehlein told me about your blog, bravo. I pray for a way to reach out to couples before the storm hits. Rather than repairing the damage the storm has done. We weather it, through the Grace of God. We pray for all the couples that struggle. We were inspired by Bill & Carolyn Rieser who spoke at Willow Creek Church & gave their testimony the week of our storm. Five years later Bill is the IL CR (Celebrate Recovery) IL Rep. Unbelievable.
      Blessings to you, Carolyn & Bruce

  • This is a great blog! I love the way you write and I love that you are pointing out the harsh realities of marriage/divorce through statistics. I also have a heavy heart from close friends and family who are/have gone through divorce, seperation and unfailthfulness. I love what your up too!

  • I am intrigued by this blog…found it on a friend’s facebook wall. I am going through a painful divorce right now that involves my wife’s relocation of my two year old daughter. Anything I can do to help with your efforts and advocate against divorce…count me in!

  • We’ve never met, Michelle, but we have mutual friends through Eastlake Bothell, where I attend. It’s through them that I saw your blog., and I now read every post. The thing is, I’m not married. I *am* in a relationship with someone who I see myself spending my life with, however, and your blog posts serve as sort of “tips” for what’s to come – and even “what’s now.” I have no doubt that you’re helping numerous married couples. I just want you to know that you’re also helping singles who want to be the best eventual spouse they can be. Thanks. 🙂

  • Michelle, I am one who did not fight for my marriage. By the time I realized what was happening to us, he was finished. Then another woman came on the scene and, even though I tried, he was upset that I was a Christian and believed in God. He could not understand how I could believe in someone I could not see. I wish I had seen what was happening sooner and could have fought for my marriage. If the opportunity should arise that I am in a relationship again, I will do as Walt and Nancy did, fight for their relationship. Thank you for starting this blog, you will help many, God bless

  • Hi Meghan,

    I would love to touch base with you. Our organization Stronger Families has created a marriage program called Oxygen for your Relationships. After reading your heartbeat for marriages, it would be great to connect. We are looking for facilitators for our program too if you know of anyone that may be interested.

    Thank you for such great info and for your heart.

    Karissa Meador. Stongerfamilies.org
    http://www.oxgenforyourrelationships.com

  • Just wanted to say HELLO and that you write a wonderful blog! I’m also from the Seattle area (Carnation…and now Kirkland) so it’s cool that we are close by! I live with my husband and 2 boys and yes…..staying married is a journey for sure! We’ve been together since high school. 🙂 Keep up the great work!

  • Loving all that I’m reading here. Found your 31 days posts through a Gottman Institute post on Facebook. Was surprised when I read you guys met in LFP…I’m just a hop, skip and a jump from there.

    We’re on the #staymarried journey, it’s been a rough year but we are plugging along. Always nice to have some extra encouragement along the way!

  • What a beautiful blog with such an incredible purpose! I’m so glad that God is using both of you to minister to the hearts of those who are fighting for their marriage in a world where it’s so easy to give up on true love and faithfulness. May God continue using you to encourage husbands and wives all around the world to not only stay married, but to stay married well and bring God glory through their relationship. May He bless you this New Year in all that you do!

  • Hi Michelle,

    I appreciate your blog. I am a pastor-missionary and love getting new ideas to help people along in their walk of life. As a pastor I am often called upon to do pre-marital counseling — in fact my personal rules before doing anyone’s wedding is that we have to meet together 7 times before the wedding. This gives me an opportunity to share Christ, and talk with them about issues that face all married couples. I can’t hit everything, but I do hit upon the majors. As a part of this, I constantly update the topics with new and fresh information the week prior to discussing that topic, and through this I stumbled upon your blog. I really liked your rules on fighting. Would it be alright with you if I printed your article and gave it to a young couple. I do not sell this. It is just a part of ministry — helping people. I will give you credit, and point them to your blog for further insights.

    Thank you so much,
    Steve DuVall

    • Absolutely! We LOVE giving things away and we are so glad you find it helpful. Feel free to print anything at all from our site – with credit – and or pass along our blog to anyone you think it might help. Thank you for reaching out to us 🙂

    • We have exactly ZERO professional training in counseling. Actually, we have approximately ZERO professional training in just about everything we set out to do… blogging… parenting… making out with each other…

      We are a married couple sharing our lives and any resources we have found helpful. We refer to professionals all the time, recommend books and counseling right here on the resources portion of our site. We hope it’s helpful, but we really have no idea what we’re doing 🙂

      Super appreciate the trolling comment, though. Have a great day!

  • Hi MIchelle! I woke up with the intention to check out your blog after seeing your #staymarried on Instagram. I felt so inspired from your posts (and I am not even married!) that I passed it onto close friends and family. xo

  • Hey Michelle,

    I am Jessica, I stumbled upon your website and enjoy the concept, I am a Personal Development Coach and Parent Educator, I show people how to use their emotions to create the results they want in their lives & have an easy, effective, and effortless relationship with their children and teachers.

    Would you be interested in coming over for a Google Chat Video or Call in (20 min) to my Live Radio Show discussing marriage? I would love us to talk about all the positive, amazing, open energy regarding marriage and relationships.
    I actually have been married to my wife for (1) year next month! Ha! I would love to feature these to my readers- making the world a brighter place by freeing people with knowledge and vibration.

  • Hi! You’re such an inspiration to married couples like us. 🙂
    True love does exist. 🙂
    I married my husband 6 months after our 10th yr anniv as bf/gf.

    XOXO

  • I really appreciate the help you offer. I am one the stats are against.

    I was sexually abused as a child. Was raped at 18 and had my baby at 19. I turned to my mother for support and instead she took my daughter from me. It was too painful to watch my baby girl calling my mother mommy so I took to going out with any guy who paid any attention to me. What a bad move that was, I’m not proud of it. Then trying to get my life straightened out I met a guy through school who used and abused me. I divorced him to save my life. Moved in with the parents again. Tried my best to care for my son, but once again my mother forced me to give him back to my ex-husband. It was horrible! It hurt me so badly. Than fast forward to 2004 I met a wonderful caring Christian man in a chat room. With the help of his family I was flown to meet with my now hubby on Valentines day. We have been together for 11 years this June. My hubby is Developmentally Disabled with Social Anxiety. This makes it all the rougher to stay married in this day and age. But we have and are #staymarried. Plus, I am Chronically ill. My heart is failing and I’m not a candidate for the heart transplant because of the ankylosing spondylitis I have. We were working on our Vow Renewal but I don’t think it is going to happen as I’m too ill. But it was going to be beautiful! I was going to make my Ballgown that , the cake and a wallhanging for the alter were all that is left to do. It is hard for me to watch my dream die. But anyways, I am proud of you, hun keep up the great work! !

  • Hey guys. I just found your site. I really like what you are doing. Its great to see other couples fighting for marriage.

    My wife and I nearly divorced. We were separated for nearly a year. We’ve been to the depths of divorce and addiction and made it out the other side! Anything is possible.

    We just welcomed our first child too! God is good.

    Keep up the good work. Im now subscribed. Look forward to new posts!

    Will

  • Howdy would you mind stating which blog platform you’re using?
    I’m planning to start my own blog soon but I’m having a hard time selecting
    between BlogEngine/Wordpress/B2evolution and Drupal.
    The reason I ask is because your layout seems different then most blogs and
    I’m looking for something completely unique. P.S My apologies for being off-topic but
    I had to ask!

  • Hi Tony and Michelle,
    I am so happy to have found your blog and to know there are people who care about marriage. The wellbeing of marriage has been on my heart for as long as I can remember and my biggest dream as a young girl was to one day have a happy family of my own. Not so unique, but at the time all my friends seemed to have other, more exciting dreams. Now as a grown up women I do have my family which I love dearly and am so proud of. But we too had to go through fire to be refined and I believe God is not finished with us yet. I started to write my own blog, not even from a need to air my thoughts but because there were so many amazing things God did for us, I wanted to share it to give others hope. You can follow me on mybloomsday.wordpress.com. Greetings to you and God bless your work, Ella

  • hi,

    You have such an inspiring blog about marriage and keeping it going strong! I’m so glad to have found this and been able to read your experience.
    I work for the company SoulPancake and have a video we made that fits the image of your blog and thought you would enjoy watching it!

    This video highlights the simple way two people can fall in love all over again or find that spark by looking into each other eyes for just a few minutes. I hope you love watching it as much as we did creating it!

    Video Link: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Xm-T3HCa618

    If you and your husband decide to take on the same challenge as our video, I would love any feedback from your experience!

    Be sure to keep in touch and follow us on our Social Media Sites to view more of our content!

    Twitter: @soulpancake
    Instagram: @soulpancake
    Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/soulpancake
    Tumblr: http://soulpancake.tumblr.com/

  • Good Evening,

    We are Chris and Ashley Greene. We are in the final stages of publishing a book we wrote called One Flesh. It is a bible base workbook for marriages that we hope can encourage and strengthen them. Here is the link to the sample of the book and if you enjoy it would would like to send you a free full copy once the book is published and we hope you think it will benefit other marriages and post it under your book resource section.

    Thank you,

    http://books.noisetrade.com/oneflesh/one-flesh-sample

  • I am really enjoying your site/blogs! I can’t seem to find the place to respond/comment on some of your posts. Do the comment sections close after a certain period of time? The journey my wife and I took looked basically like this: infidelity (on my part several times), then filing for divorce, then forgiveness (on her part), then stopping the divorce, restoration, and the long process of healing.

    If you’d like to know a little more about our story, I’ve been writing it out in two places:
    the blog with all of my posts:
    http://forgivencheater.blogspot.com/

    and the full site (with not as many posts):
    http://www.forgivencheater.com/

  • Hello Michelle and Tony,
    I came accross your site looking for content for my marriage magazine called Love Nurture (find it at http://eruvwuobuaya.com/), I would like to use your story in the next edition and the photograph that came with it and reference your blog. I’m obviously impressed, hence I ask, thank you for turning your passion into blogging to help couples stay married and thank you Tony for the excellent design.

  • Thank you, thank you, thank you for your blog “Sometimes My Wife Complains”. I couldn’t stop crying because for the first time I felt like someone finally understands me. I always feel like my responsibilities as a wife, mom and daughter are endless and not much recognized. And when I bring this up, I am called complaining and selfish. But the truth is, I love to do it for everyone but just want to hear affirmation that I am appreciated. Keep up what you both are doing!


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