Season 2 Ep. 7 of The #staymarried Podcast: Your Baggage Doesn’t Have to Wreck Your Marriage

Season 2 Episode 7 of The #staymarried Podcast: Your Baggage Doesn't Have to Wreck Your MarriageAt the age of eighteen I was diagnosed with Dysthymia. I can’t stand the labels of things, but I also value that they help make murky ideas a little bit more clear. Dysthymia is a mild form of depression, mostly manageable without medication. It is very real, but not necessarily incapacitating. The trouble with this kind of depression is that, because I am used to being just a little less joyful than the average person, a true season of deeper depression can sneak up on me pretty easily.

Dysthymia has also made me more susceptible to severe postpartum depression (PPD). I didn’t know that when we decided to start having kids, so rather than being snuck up on by a depressive season, I was tackled by a huge linebacker of darkness and self-loathing after the birth of my first daughter. I was deep under the weight of it and we really weren’t sure if I would make it out or if our marriage would still be intact if and when I did.

In today’s episode of The #staymarried Podcast Tony and I answer two questions back-to-back. Both are pretty heavy. One listener asked about navigating PPD, and another asked about coping with and helping their partner cope with past trauma and abuse. Because these issues have been intertwined in my life and then in our marriage, we’re talking about it all. Below I will also link to older posts where Tony and I have also written about some of these experiences, in case reading is more your thing or you’d just like more detail and resources after you listen.

Here’s Season 2, Episode 7 of The #staymarried Podcast


Many marriages experience the rough waters of mental health struggles, bringing home a new baby, job loss, moving away from family and friends, and a number of other challenges. We believe strongly that these challenges can be weathered together and don’t have to cause the end of a marriage. It takes some skillful navigating, and we’re here to help.

Season 2 Episode 7 of The #staymarried Podcast: Your Baggage Doesn't Have to Wreck Your Marriage

In this episode we listed some of the symptoms of postpartum depression, as well as “baby blues” and postpartum psychosis. We really believe these signs and symptoms are things everyone should know and be able to look for, not only in themselves and their partner, but also in their friends and loved ones. Any kind of mental health issue can be so isolating, and we know that isolation only makes things worse. Please PIN THIS so that you can share it and come back to it yourself in case you ever need it.

Season 2 Ep. 7 of The #staymarried Podcast: Navigating Trauma, Post-Partum, & Mental Health in Your Marriage

We hope that by sharing our story and experiences we can do our part to tear down the stigma of mental illness so that those of us that need it aren’t quite so afraid to reach out for help and support. Let’s be brave by naming our brand of crazy so that others know they can name theirs and not suffer alone.

Want to read more about this topic? Check these out…

Living With My Partner’s Baggage – by Tony Peterson
The Reason I Take A Million Pictures
Lost in the Fog: Guest Post by Carmen Meeks
“My goal is to not die…” – Postpartum Depression and Our Marriage

 The #staymarried blog was created to offer hope, stories, and resources for couples who want to stay married.

Don’t forget to submit your questions right here: Ask #staymarried! We would love to help you navigate your way to a long and happy marriage!

If you found this post and podcast helpful, we would be honored if you would share it. Our big dream is to see more and more people living in happy and healthy marriages!

Tony and Michelle Peterson #staymarriedIf you’re NEW HERE, check out our About Page and read a little more about my own background on our first post. You can also find us on the socials: PinterestTwitterFacebook, and Instagram. I’d love to connect on any of your favorite platforms.

Thank you for reading, sharing, and being a part of this #staymarried community!

~ Michelle

 

Season 2 Episode 7 of The #staymarried Podcast: Your Baggage Doesn't Have to Wreck Your Marriage

 

 

 

 

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9 responses

  • I loved this podcast episode, and it’s such an important topic. As the wife of someone with undiagnosed depression, I would love to hear more from Tony about how to be supportive while also making sure you’re own needs are being met.

    • Thanks so much for taking the time to listen, Jess. You ask such a good question! Tony wrote about how he learned to navigate our relationship and love me in this post: http://staymarriedblog.com/living-with-my-partners-baggage/
      But, the way you pose the question about making sure his own needs are being met has really got me thinking I need to talk to him more about that and find out how he feels now.

  • I just wanted to say thank you so much for sharing this. It wasn’t an easy listen but I just think you (both) are incredible for being so open and sharing your experiences and I really appreciate that you took the time to do so and share something so difficult and so painful.
    I’ve been married a little over a year and both me and my husband have experienced some mental health issues in that year and hearing people being honest about them and still so obviously in love and supportive of each other is really inspirational. Overall I really enjoy the podcasts and the way you approach things and want to say thanks so much for making them and sharing. Xx

    • Thanks for listening, Lizzie 🙂
      Our Mental Health is such an important part of our lives and marriage. Sometimes I wish I’d been more prepared for the effect it would have on us, but we are learning all the time how to navigate our junk and still love each other.
      xoxo

  • Oh goodness Michelle, I’m not sure we are the exact same brand of crazy….but it’s kind of like we are both kelloggs, but I’m Corn Flakes and you are the frosted flake variety. It was so healing for me to hear you tell your story…because so much of your story is my story. I did not have experience with abuse, but I VERY much had postpartum depression. Hearing someone else speak the very thoughts I had, the very emotions. Hearing you talk about your husband talking to you and you didn’t hear him. Hearing about how Tony reached out to find you help. Hearing even down to the detail of your thoughts of falling down the stairs. So much of that was my story too.

    How freeing to know you are not alone. How freeing to give up some of that guilt that you missed those moments with your baby. Knowing that someone else went through something so much like my story lets me give up a little of that guilt, I wasn’t to blame. There’s no way I could be, because I don’t even “know” you and you had the same experience and I wasn’t at all involved.

    Thank you for being so brave. This podcast is truly something everyone needs to hear. So many mamas are suffering in silence due to the “stigma” of mental health issues. And those that may see it have no idea how to help. Your story gives much needed insight into the disease as well as how others helped you gives insight into what others can do.

    I feel like we are soul sisters now. I am also about 2 years out of the hardest of the storm. And like you said I still have some dark days, but I’m so glad to be out of the darkest of it. So soul sister, keep sharing your story, keep loving those girls with your sweet heart, and keep encouraging marriages and those that listen to ya’ll. You are making an impact.

  • Thank you for sharing your personal story. Thankfully people ARE saying, “we need to talk about our darker issues MORE” and it starts with people who are brave enough to do it, like you Michelle! Thank you so much. Each story makes our world better I believe. Thank you and Tony for giving others hope and being honest!

    I’m still learning about my hangups, but I did stop by to also say, they, mine especially, rear their ugly heads in marriage! Which makes perfect, ironic, sense especially if you believe that marriage is something that sharpens us and makes us better people. (Now my husband is next to me on my ride through self discovery. He’s been a trooper even though I know it is hard for him.) I’m thankful many of us have partners right there in our home to helps us work through them as a team, even though it can be so DIFFICULT.

    Thanks for giving us insight and tools to navigate through the highs and lows!

  • Dr. Ken Newberger on

    My son and daughter-in-law just had their first baby this week. This episode where you list symptoms of postpartum depression, as well as discuss “baby blues” and postpartum psychosis is very good. This is info. will be of great benefit for them to know. Thanks so much for the posting.

    Dr. Ken Newberger
    http://www.OurRelationshipsMatters.com