Welcome to Episode 10 of The Seven Do’s and Four Don’ts for a Long and Happy Marriage. THIS Episode is the reason we’ve asked you to listen to all of the episodes in order. I’ll list them again at the bottom of this blog post if you need to catch up, because the things we teach you today will be really difficult to do if you haven’t yet gotten a grasp on The Four Don’ts and the first Four Do’s.
Today, in Episode 10, we’ll cover Principle #5: Solve Your Solvable Problems. We will even share with you real time a problem we’ve been having and work through a solution together using the 5 methods we’ve learned from The Gottman Institute. If you’ve ever disagreed about anything in your marriage, you’re really going to like this one…
If you’re enjoying the podcast and have found the #staymarried blog helpful in the past, we’ve created some ways that you can partner with us to help us continue to provide these free resources for couples who need them. Check out our Partner Page for some ideas. THANK YOU to those of you that already have!
As always, this series is based on the New York Time’s Bestseller The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work because those researchers are smart and they know what they are talking about. If you don’t already have this book, you can get it here.
Ok, go ahead and have a listen…
Seriously, why do we do this to ourselves? It’s not my favorite to discuss conflict, but conflict is a normal part of marriage and we really hope this episode helps. As promised, here is a graphic that you can refer to help you remember the 5 methods it takes to solve your solvable problems. (Hint: PIN THIS so you can come back to it later)
These are the five questions from The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work that we used toward the end of our problem solving session. Use any or all of these to help you navigate your own solvable problem.
- What do we agree about?
- What are our common feelings or the most important feelings here?
- What common goals can we have here?
- How can we understand this situation, this issue?
- How do we think these goals should be accomplished?
Want to read more about some of the topics we discussed? Here are a few blog posts you may like:
If you’ve missed an episode, catch up here…
♥ Ep. 1 – Intro to The #staymarried Podcast and The Gottman Institute
♥ Ep. 2 – Do #1 – Exploring Love Maps
♥ Ep. 3 – Do #2 – Nurture Fondness and Admiration
♥ Ep. 4 – Don’t #1 – Criticism is a Relationship Killer
♥ Ep. 5 – Don’t #2 – Contempt is Sulfuric Acid for Love
♥ Ep. 6 – Do #3 – Finding Romance in the Little Things
♥ Ep. 7 – Do #4 – Accepting Each Other’s Influence
♥ Ep. 8 – Don’t #3 – Defensiveness Will Drive You Apart
♥ Ep. 9 – Don’t #4 – Stonewalling Sets You Up for Failure
The #staymarried blog was created to offer hope, stories, and resources for couples who want to stay married.
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